Men are better than women...

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Men are better than women...

Post by Vampire_of_Death on April 26th 2010, 9:38 pm

I honestly don't know how to take this. Is it supposed to be a joke but seeing how there is a whole site and a book, I am not really sure. I don;t if you guys know, but I really am pretty laid back when it comes to most things and men vs. women really doesn't bother me. My beliefs are summed up in one word, equality. Now, I not one of those batshit crazy, what do they call 'em, Femi-Nazis? Whatever, as long as I am allowed to do what men are, as log as I have a choice, I don;t have a problem and I don't want to spend my weekends petitioning for same sex bathrooms.

But this article, I don't know, I starting laughing at first until it kind of set in that people really do still feel like this.Right now, I feel a bit indifferent.

I'll post the site and article below, but it contains some adult language.

How did this make you feel? And who honestly has time to sit and think why one sex is better than the other and type up articles? In reality, woman hating or not, men would not be here without women and women would not be here with out men. Its basic reproduction.

http://www.menarebetterthanwomen.com/

"Top Ten Reasons Men Are Better Than Women
MenAreBetterThanWomen.com reached 200,000 visitors early this morning, so I thought I would mark the occasion by posting a very special top ten list of the top ten ways in which men are better than women.

Naturally as a man the moment I thought of an idea I set to work implementing it — in this case by writing it. It would have been exactly the same if my idea had been the wheel or the Hoover Dam. That’s because I’m a man and instead of taking shit from the world around me, I can shove shit right back into it as well.

Dick’s Top Ten Reasons MenAreBetterThanWomen.com

10. Men do not have Tourette Syndrome

I believe all women suffer from a mild and extremely localized form of Tourette Syndrome. The afflicted organ? Their tongues. That’s why women cannot shut their f-cking mouths for ten seconds while adults are speaking around them. Their tongues are battling around in their mouths like drunken Vipers.

9. Men are not sponges

Women are social chameleons — or better yet: social vampires. Women walk into a situation and before you know it they’ve completely changed their wardrobe and mannerisms as if they’ve joined a f-cking cult. Men are not sheep. Everyone knows the word for a female sheep is ewe, but what about the male word? There isn’t one because sheep is something men are not.

8. Women are racists

Women’s entire lives and social circles are based around hatred. Do they hate their boyfriends? Do they hate their wardrobe? Do they hate each other? Yes, yes and f-ck definitely. Men don’t go in for that silly sort of nonsense. If we’re dissatisfied, we pick up and move out. Or we take our mighty man muscles and lift f-cking mountains so the world looks exactly the way we want it to. Men do more world changing before 9:00 AM than any woman ever has done in her whole life.

7. Men live less than women

The last thing a society needs is a bunch of non-contributing members laying around and sucking all the juice from the young. Men know this so they blast off from birth like shooting man stars — burning out ten years faster, but setting the whole night ablaze with manness. Women just kind of lie around like big fat pigs in big fat puddles of shit. Congratulations women. You really earned those rights!

6. Men write illegibly

Writing is stupid and an ineffective way to communicate. Men know this so they don’t give a shit about handwriting things with big hoops and loops and squiggles and shit so aliens can read notes about remembering to pick up your birth control pills after 6th period from space.

5. Jesus was a man

Whether or not you believe in Jesus, there is one fact you can’t argue with: he was a man. No religion anywhere has ever put a woman in charge of shit. That’s called dogma — man-dogma — and it means men are better than women.

4. Men wear watches

Do you know why men wear watches? It’s because there’s a limited amount of time in the day and men need to know how much of it there is so they can efficiently allocate their man ass kicking for the day. Women don’t wear watches; they wear bracelets. Women wearing bracelets is like dropping a bus of retarded kids off in front of a taffy pulling machine. They can just stare for hours and never get bored.

A watch says, ‘Get up and go! Move your man ass and take care of your f-cking man business!’ That’s why 60 minutes uses a ticking watch for its theme song. ‘Important shit is going down and we’re about to talk about it in a f-cking fastidious manner, so get the f-ck ready,’ says a ticking watch. A bracelet says, ‘You’re most likely ugly, but look at how much money you’re worth!’ What a joke.

3. Boys destroy things

The only thing that has ever lifted our species out of the trees where we came from is our ability to destroy. Take paper: the cornerstone of the modern world. That was invented because man wanted to destroy trees and beat them into pulp. How about nuclear power? Men invented that too. Men are natural destructors. We pop right out of the man-womb and start on a life-long tirade of progress by tearing down the Earth with our mighty, man-manly man-fists. Goddammit, that’s awesome!

2. Marriage is stupid

Marriage is 100% the fault of women. It was invented by men though! Did you know that? Marriage was invented because women were too busy whoring it out to f-ck the only the guy who was paying their rent and feeding their fat asses French bon-bons every day. Men invented marriage as a way of telling women who they could and couldn’t f-ck. Like everything else men have ever invented, it completely worked and worked way better than any man thought it would. Women became so indoctrinated by the man-invention of marriage that they’re f-cking obsessed with it.

Marriage is still stupid. It’s a stupid game invented to entertain stupid minds and to teach basic lessons of fidelity that even invertebrates are born with.

1. Men have penises

When it comes to being a man, being quick at identifying problems is tantamount to fixing them. In fact it’s tantamount-ier. Having a penis — in other words looking like a man and having man parts — is a man’s way of telling other men, ‘Hey. Look at me. I’m a man. I won’t f-ck up whatever it is that you’re trying to do. If you need some help, maybe ask me and I’ll see if I can lend a man-hand. It’s the least I could do to be f-cking courteous.’

Men Are Better Than Women."


EDIT: Okay, I found this gem on their front page. Now I am mad. I feel like killing something, how point a pound do I get if its a Jackass?

No seriously, bad language ahead:

Dick Masterson’s 2009 Man Challenge
I was getting so many text messages from hot babes on New Year’s Eve that my phone overloaded and permanently shut down. At least that’s what the technician at the Verizon store told me and I have no reason to doubt him. Not only does that mean I am 100% right when I say women love being told their place in life — especially hot women — but it also means that it’s a new year, and thus time for a Dick Masterson Annual Man Challenge.

Congratulations to all of you who passed my Dick Masterson’s 2008 Man Challenge. It was a tough one and by my estimation only two of you actually passed, but you all had fun trying.

Now buckle up your boners, gentlemen, because even you two returning gladiators are going to need an extra set of nuts to beat this year’s Dick Masterson’s 2009 Man Challenge.

As I explained last year, new year’s resolutions are for ladies. They’re for people who get as much personal satisfaction out of intending to better themselves than actually doing it. Women think buying a guitar and playing a guitar is the same thing. Women think not enjoying the blowj-b she drunkenly gave her coworker during the Christmas party makes her a faithful wife.

If she didn’t like it, it didn’t happen.

1. Don’t ever argue with a woman: Man Point Day Off

Women are like a broken clocks with tits. When 11:37 rolls around, she seems like the smartest set of tits on Earth. But that’s why God only intended sex to last 14 minutes. Otherwise, women would have all day to call the shots instead of just the time it takes to give your junk a sink bath.

Women are always wrong. Women get lucky from time to time and act like complete cunts about it, but remember this: even if a woman is right, she’s wrong.

You see, women don’t use logic like men do. And without logic, you can’t be right. You can only be a lucky pain in the ass. Without logic, you can’t be reasoned with or convinced in any way. You can’t understand the difference between feelings and rational thought, beyond the fact that both are coming out of someone’s mouth, and if that’s all it takes to be a good argument, I might as well start calling my c*ck Henry Kissinger! Actually, I am going to do that now.

Nicknaming your own penis: +200 Man Points

When you argue with a woman, you are effectively saying you have nothing better to do today than waste your time. Check your penis at the door, kemo sabe. She’s not listening, she won’t do shit if you don’t do what she says, and nothing in the world will make her happy. A freeze on your Man Points for the rest of the day is your penalty for being a jackass.

2. Find a wild stripper: +3,000 Man Points

Strippers exist in the wild. That is to say, strippers are out there walking around like normal women: shopping, buying books, looking at celebrity gossip on the internet, whatever else women do. I know this to be true in theory, and I have personally seen it!

To complete my Dick Masteron’s 2009 Man Challenge, you have to find a wild stripper! Bag her, tag her, and make sure to find out where she works! She won’t want you to know because the last thing she wants is your grinning ass showing up with a hard on and her real name, but that’s the best thing about being a man. Who gives a f-ck what women want?

3. Kill an animal: +1 Man Points per pound

Animals are meant to be killed by human men. It doesn’t matter if you’re going to eat them or stuff them full of candy and play a practical man-joke on kids. Shoot a pig, buy a fur, send a dog to the pound, it doesn’t f-cking matter. As long as you killed for reasons that fall between providing a slight convenience and “yucks”, you did the right thing.

Because really, what more noble goal is there than providing slight convenience?

Animals are just like computers. They have no soul and no mystical sense of anything beyond what goes in their stomachs. “Animal rights” is a profitable misnomer invented by women just like every other “humanitarian” movement that all follow one simple theme:

Bitches will get uncomfortable if they can’t feel the end of their leash.

Women are like dogs. If they can’t feel you yanking on their emotional leash and telling them to calm the f-ck down about shit they don’t understand, they’ll lose their goddamn minds. Have you ever met a woman who was a humanitarian crusader? Did she seem happy to you? No. She seemed wound up tighter than Tex Avery at a tit factory.

Do her a favor. Aim for the stray cat.

4. Pick up a check: +18% Man Points

The Pick Up Artist community has turned thousands of young men into silly cheap-shits. Their “The Game” plan is simple:

1. Don’t pay for shit.
2. ?
3. p-ssy!

But that’s like switching from live bait to dynamite when you’re fishing in the bathtub. Here’s a straighter line between points U and P:

1. Stop dating chicks that aren’t going to f-ck you!

But in the end, they’re half right. If you’re shooting booty calls out of a cannon, the appletini’s are going to add up. And so are the Planned Parenthood receipts. My point is, fine, don’t pay for women, but do pay for men because Dick is getting a bit sick of picking up the tab every f-cking time.

Money is an aphrodisiac. Paying for drinks, paying for movie tickets, paying for any bullshit no matter how cheap it is will get a lady’s humper pumping. That’s a guarantee. But more importantly, using a calculator when the check comes is a loss of f-cking Man Points. Counting your tax out in 1’s is a loss of f-cking Man Points. Asking for change when the group is bigger than 5 people is a loss of f-cking Man Points. A surprise missing 120 dollars on the New Year’s Eve tab is a loss of everyone’s f-cking Man Points except mine. f-ck you cheap assholes.

But in all seriousness, always pay for a girl’s abortion. Or make sure you physically see the receipt.

5. Have two threesomes with the same girls: -50 Man Points

Anyone can have a threesome. I’ve had like seven. You can catch two “lesbians” on a bad day. You can guilt your wife into it after she dings your new car. Whatever you want. But having two threesomes with the same two chicks? Forget about it. That’s a man challenge. Even with hookers, having two threesomes with the same two chicks requires a level of cunning and manipulation so great, Machiavelli himself would give you a congratulatory blow job. But that’s the thing about getting a blow job from Machiavelli. What’s he after?

Getting your c*ck passport stamped in threesome town can be a treacherous affair. Imagine if they had a type of cocaine that only worked on emotions. Actually, don’t imagine that. I’ve seen it and I hated every second of it. Having a threesome is like carrying two early-90’s computer monitors across a tightrope over a swimming pool. In other words, it’s precarious as f-ck — and not as sexy as you thought it would be — but the only thing you stand to lose is personal relationships with women, and who gives a f-ck about those!

Having a threesome is a subtraction of Man Points because seriously, f-ck you.

Send me an email if you manage to topple this year’s Dick Masterson’s Man Challenge. I will post a log of the year’s manliest man men below.

And also, stay tuned to SuperFrat for the thrilling conclusion of my Dick Masterson Chauvinist Detective saga. As you can see in the strip below, my pants have come off. That’s when I mean business.


I'm going to quit reading now and go hunt some Dick Masterson. Oh, he had such a fitting first name...

I wonder how many points he is worth on that niffty man scale of his...


And even if his entire works are satire, the comments alone are enough.

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Re: Men are better than women...

Post by Ghost on April 26th 2010, 10:20 pm

Reading between the lines: My guess is that he made what he thought was an innocent comment and ended up getting dumped over it.... He seems kind of bitter to me. (Although I can understand why women who know him are apparently refusing to speak to him.)

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Re: Men are better than women...

Post by ZombieData on April 27th 2010, 5:43 am

That has to be a joke. It's too closeminded and ignorant it's burning my eyes out. The reason I react this way is because it reminds me of the Rednecks at school who would pick on me and call me gay.

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Re: Men are better than women...

Post by Twi on April 27th 2010, 8:48 pm

I just want to point out that men can have Tourette Syndrome...

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Re: Men are better than women...

Post by Rikachu on April 27th 2010, 8:55 pm

*has tourettes syndrome*

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Re: Men are better than women...

Post by Liz on April 27th 2010, 10:26 pm

I shall fly the bullshit flag.

(I may add that I say this to the topic, to avoid confusion to what Ri said. I'm not an idiot.)


Last edited by Liz on May 1st 2010, 8:05 pm; edited 1 time in total

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Re: Men are better than women...

Post by Ghost on April 28th 2010, 12:40 pm

Tourettes syndrome doesn't apply to something that you have to actually hit "enter" after you say. If you know you have it, you can proofread.

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Re: Men are better than women...

Post by Rapsheba555 on April 28th 2010, 3:16 pm

I think it's just another sexist. Bitter and dumb. Sadly, I know many people like this person.

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Re: Men are better than women...

Post by Vampire_of_Death on April 28th 2010, 5:24 pm

Yep, but I am at an womens school and I hear shit about how all women are better then men and it gets really old. I mean, really, really old.

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Re: Men are better than women...

Post by Rapsheba555 on April 28th 2010, 9:00 pm

Yeah. For some people it's just impossible to imagine that we're equal and different at the same time.

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Re: Men are better than women...

Post by WhiteWaterWood on May 1st 2010, 7:31 pm

That looks like a big joke with some bitterness thrown in. You should see 'Dave Barry's Guide to Guys' which was WRITTEN by a guy. XD Funny stuff, but not all that complementary.

I don't think he's serious because of the part where he considers men dying sooner and writing so that no one can read it good points. :P

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Re: Men are better than women...

Post by Liz on May 1st 2010, 8:06 pm

Above post by me has been edited to avoid further confusion.

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Re: Men are better than women...

Post by Liros on May 7th 2010, 1:31 pm

You know, these "Women traits" things always make me laugh.
Because about 90% of the junk they portray women as doing, I don't do.
I was born female, am still female, am not lesbian, and have no desire to get a sex-change.
So, does that mean I am not a woman by this guy's standards?
For example; here is how I would handle the bill on a date where we had a meal together, and I have money to burn;
If I had a great time, I'm going to cover the whole check. Why? Because I don't want my date to stress about that. Plus, it shows I am independent, and not trying to sponge off of him.
If it was an ok time, I'll pay my half, he can pay his. Because it's fair. Like going to dinner with a friend; you eat it, you pay for it. That easy.
If it was a terrible date, if I haven't gotten up halfway through the meal and left, I'm dumping the check on him. Because honestly, when I go out on a date with someone, I am on my best behavior, but mostly, I am myself. So if it is a bad date, that's all on him. And so is the bill. So what if he thinks I am the stereotypical woman? Chances are, I will never go out with him again.

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Re: Men are better than women...

Post by Vampire_of_Death on May 7th 2010, 6:33 pm

Liros, I do somewhat similar, but for me, it really depends on the guy. UnlessI had a horrible time, I always offer to pay and if I think he will give in, I we will playfully argue about it. The one time, he let me win and I later found the exact change hidden under my pillow. I asked him about it and he said it was the "I won"fairy. That one was a good laugh for the next couple of weeks.

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Re: Men are better than women...

Post by WhiteWaterWood on May 19th 2010, 3:40 pm

That's so cute! XD

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